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Expect and Embrace Failure Anytime You Do New Work

Coats hanging on wall hooksInstructions given are not magically understood.

By Bill Reeb

The learning process is often frustrating. So why is it so difficult to learn new things?

MORE: Be Realistic Regarding Expectations | Stop Wishing Your Life Away | Don’t Let Inertia Determine Your Direction | What Does ‘Getting Stuck’ or ‘Being Stuck’ Mean? | 3 Ways to Get ‘Unstuck’
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One answer is that we don’t have “hooks” for what we don’t know (neither the mental acuity nor the physical skills). An example of this is found anytime businesses train their employees.
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Be Realistic Regarding Expectations

Golf club by tee at tee box, looking downhill at holeAre you putting in the work to be where you think you should be?

By Bill Reeb

During golf season, I like to hit practice balls at the driving range. I also like to take lessons with my golf professional – mostly playing lessons as opposed to ball striking lessons, because just hitting the ball is far less of a problem than the lapse of synapses striking properly in my brain.

MORE: Stop Wishing Your Life Away | Determining Your Desires Should Be an Active Process | Know Where You Are Running To | Let Go of What You Think You Know
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To clarify, during a normal game, I try to hit shots that I have no business hitting, or forget to stay in the moment, or fail to focus on hitting one shot at a time. But during my playing lessons, I review with the pro what I plan to do and why I am making the shot choices I am proposing. It should be no surprise that with this level of concentration and shot-by-shot focus, I play some of my best golf with my pro in tow.
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Stop Wishing Your Life Away

Climber standing atop mountain with another in distanceLearn to appreciate the joy that comes from and surrounds the work.

By Bill Reeb

We spend about 99.7 percent (statistic totally fabricated but the phrase “vast majority” would certainly apply) of our time en route to some objective. If you can find happiness, serenity or a feeling of success only when you arrive at your intended destinations, then you are destined to be unhappy or feeling unsuccessful almost all of the time.

MORE: Determining Your Desires Should Be an Active Process | A Clear Direction Provides You a Sanity Check | Refining Desire | Roadblocks from People with Good Intentions | 3 Ways to Get ‘Unstuck’
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I remember my wife and I vacationing in Puerto Rico many years ago. We decided to go to the El Yunque National Forest Reserve and walk up to the top of one of the El Yunque mountains. Given that we like to hike, this was not a difficult climb because it was only about five miles roundtrip on a paved path.
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Determining Your Desires Should Be an Active Process

woman ladder binoculars city view outlook vision success climb AdobeStock_57204649.jpegBONUS: A flowchart of desire.

By Bill Reeb

I believe that every day, in a way, we do exactly what we want to do or what we desire. For instance, you might be frustrated by your present weight, but if you don’t change your eating habits or exercise regimen, then you clearly do not desire to lose weight.

MORE: A Clear Direction Provides You a Sanity Check | Don’t Let Inertia Determine Your Direction | What Does ‘Getting Stuck’ or ‘Being Stuck’ Mean? | 3 Ways to Get ‘Unstuck’
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Another idea that complicates determining what we want, which is far more subtle and complex, is that we subconsciously or consciously suppress many of our desires.
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A Clear Direction Provides You a Sanity Check

Upward arrows illustrating being on or off trackWhen new ideas arise, ask how they fit.

By Bill Reeb

Without clear direction, every alternative seems like an opportunity. With direction comes a course of action, whether that is to preserve what you have or achieve something different. Knowing what direction you want to head will drive the creation of a plan. And the greatest benefit of planning is that it provides you with a sanity check to know when you are drifting off course.

MORE: Don’t Let Inertia Determine Your Direction | Know Where You Are Running To | Refining Desire | What Does ‘Getting Stuck’ or ‘Being Stuck’ Mean? | Let Go of What You Think You Know | Roadblocks from People with Good Intentions | 3 Ways to Get ‘Unstuck’
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Regardless of whether we are talking about your personal life, career or business, I believe it is nearly impossible to get to your desired destination (accomplish your goals) in a straight line. We end up straying from our original course because of mistakes we make along the way, opportunities (detours) we see that we can’t pass up, or just having to deal with the chaos that permeates our lives.
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Don’t Let Inertia Determine Your Direction

Train tracks going both ahead and off to leftYou DO get to choose.

By Bill Reeb

Inertia can be like drifting, which actually describes what many people do. What I mean is, many people just do more of what they did yesterday to keep afloat, or robotically attempt the next incremental step forward from where they are right now. It is as if they are treading water working hard throughout life and just letting the current take them wherever it is going.

MORE: Know Where You Are Running To | Refining Desire | What Does ‘Getting Stuck’ or ‘Being Stuck’ Mean? | Let Go of What You Think You Know | Roadblocks from People with Good Intentions | 3 Ways to Get ‘Unstuck’
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The breakdown in this approach is that it presumes you are exactly where you want to be right now, and that the current is going in the direction you want to go. Overachievers often find themselves in this predicament: working hard treading water going with the current without a clear direction in mind.
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Know Where You Are Running To

Businessman crossing finish line after leaping hurdlesDo you have a goal or just a speed?

By Bill Reeb

If you decide you want to make some changes, that’s great.

MORE: Refining Desire | What Does ‘Getting Stuck’ or ‘Being Stuck’ Mean? | Let Go of What You Think You Know | Roadblocks from People with Good Intentions | 3 Ways to Get ‘Unstuck’
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But before you start running away from whatever it is that you don’t like, make sure you know what you are running toward.

Consider this scenario…

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Refining Desire

Businesswoman at crossroads, facing two pathsIf you can’t use your time and apply your energy on your highest priority items, what does that disconnect say?

By Bill Reeb

Having a desire for something is the first step in your process. Once you have identified what is important to you, the desire step then includes creating

  • a plan,
  • plan tactics,
  • a realistic timeline and
  • reasonable expectations.

MORE: What Does ‘Getting Stuck’ or ‘Being Stuck’ Mean? | Let Go of What You Think You Know | Roadblocks from People with Good Intentions | 3 Ways to Get ‘Unstuck’
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My approach is to immediately start introducing you to a variety of techniques, each followed by a short exercise that will ask you to assess how you are performing as well as how you might apply the technique to help maintain or start building momentum toward your objective. These techniques are focused on helping you discover what you want to achieve.
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